Growing Pains

These are the lovely hot air balloons that accompanied me to work last week... Louisville has been celebrating in full swing, preparing for the Derby with all its might. These bright spots of color were just a precursor to the exciting day that is today.

And I see pictures of my friends on Facebook... one friend is having a Derby Party (she did invite me- I'm not planning on going) and another friend went with some other single girls (dressed-up and with large hats!) to The Oaks celebrations yesterday.

Fun, right?

Yet here I am at home. Almost content to stay here; resting or boringly (but oh so satisfyingly), baking while my husband continues to prepare for his sermon tomorrow.

Content that is, until I see these pictures, and remember that I used to be a fun person!! I used to love being in the thick of these things. I was the thickener of these things! I miss it. I miss the old me a little. I miss having energy to join in (oh the tiredness this baby gives already), the gusto to make the socializing happen whenever, and the almost crazy pace of being in the middle of many groups of friends. I miss my part-time work schedule too, where socializing could happen on Wednesday morning impromptu coffee dates.

How crazy this all this is. As I am so, so happy with my introverted husband who gazes at me adoringly even as my body begins to stretch and expand and do such weird things. I am so blessed to be in a church, that tiny as it is, has real people living life with one another and they (who are so different than me) are becoming a consistent set of friends and co-laborers. And I'm going to be a mother soon. (I had to stop and take a deep breath after typing that sentence!!!!)

So- along with the discomfort of my stretching abdominal wall- I'm feeling the discomfort of a changing life. Not that I haven't felt these growing pains in my friendships before... because I have. Moving overseas does that. And then getting married does it too. But mostly... I just need to acknowledge that life changes, and it's allowed to. It's going to change a WHOLE LOT MORE in a few months. So right now, I'm allowing myself to mourn a little bit. Then I'm going to move on and be thankful for where God has placed me now, and look to Him in these continuing challenges and changes.